Friday, January 21, 2011

The Great Debate: Do Skinny Girls Have More Fun?

Jennifer Hudson: Before & After weight loss
The other night I found myself in the middle of an intriguing discussion on Twitter with a well-known maven in the fashion & entertainment industry. The discussion was so thought-provoking, I figured I would bring it to LoveBrownSugar and get you guys' opinion on the situation. As you all know, from my Curvy Girls Ode and all the hype that generated in the fashion blogosphere about that post, I'm very outspoken when it comes to the great debate about plus size vs. skinny in the fashion industry. If you haven't read it, check it out HERE.

So on last Tuesday evening as everyone on my timeline revved up for the premiere of BET's new series The Game, I stumbled on a tweet from a prominent black socialite and fashionista while she was watching a rerun of hit TV series Glee. I've always loved her sophisticated style as a plus-sized vet in the industry. So I was surprised and intrigued when I saw this statement from her on Twitter...

@(SocialiteNameHere): "Black girl on Glee is EVERYTHING to me, I want her to lose weight & no not 4 health reasons but so she can be 20 in a HIT show & enjoy it FULLY"
Now upon first reading it, I didn't take it very seriously. But once I re-read the part about "not 4 health reasons", I had to think to myself - "Why then? If not for health, why does she want her to lose weight?"

Amber Riley at 2011 Golden Globes
I personally love Amber Riley's style and I think, as a plus size girl on a hit TV show who never looks sloppy or inappropriately dressed, she's a great role model. In fact, I thought she looked FAB at this year's Golden Globes (pictured above). So when I saw this statement I was intrigued and I decided to comment.

Here's how the Twitter conversation went:
LoveBrownSugar: I actually like Amber's curves! I think she's such a great role model for plus size girls on TV. And she's so pretty!
(SocialiteNameHere): She is pretty however, if you are a young girl that can't wear a bikini without rolls spilling over, I'm sure it sucks!
LoveBrownSugar: Lol don't sleep on a FIERCE one piece honey! Hahah but yeah I get where you're coming from.
(SocialiteNameHere): Lamb, a 1-piece is fine at a certain age but I wouldn't trade my Versace 2-piece of yesterday for my Pucci 1 piece of today! You don't have to be rail thin but no one wants to be on a hit show w/girls that borrow DESIGNER gowns & u get yours made! End of the day what overweight female celeb do u know that stays overweight, even J Hud finally slimmed down & now LOOK. 

LoveBrownSugar: Hmm I guess it's a case of "can't miss something you've never had" b/c I've never been considered thin but never felt slighted.

(SocialiteNameHere):  Having access but not being able to access it due to something that you can change can't be fun!
And that was the end of our Twitter conversation. I could've responded to her last statement but it really made me think. Not only did I begin to question whether or not there was a whole new "skinny girl" world I was missing out on my entire life, but I started to question if that's what outsiders thought about me and every other girl who isn't considered slim. 

Do people think I live a miserable life? Better yet, do I live a miserable life but I just don't know it? I posed the question to my boyfriend and naturally he came to my defense. But to be true to this discussion, I really want to hear it from you guys - plus size or not - because I think these statements speak to a broader conversation about society and the way we think. Should Amber Riley feel any less beautiful or feel like she's having less "fun" because she's curvier than her castmates or because she has to get gowns custom-made? Should I feel bad that I have to skip to the double digit section of a department store rack instead of the single digit ones? I wanna know...

Do you guys think skinny girls have more fun? Be brutally honest with me. Soundoff below!
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  1. I'd have to personally say yes. Of course I can go into Lane Bryant, Avenue, & Maurices....but all of those Stores and others feel like we curvy girls nee big buttons, floral prints with bigger flowers designs and cumbersome pieces. I'm a minimalist when it comes to clothing and often wonder:

    1. Why is it that I can purchase from Old Navy and Forever 21 but I have to do it online without being able to try hinge on.
    2. Why are most of the plus size models still an unrealistic size....is there not 1 plus size model with a belly?
    3. Why are most t-shirts fitted at the midsection? No that t- shirt does not make my belly/midsection look slimmer....it only exaggerates my muffin top & calls for me to continually tug at my shirt all day!

    So therefore, this year I have personally decided to slim down. Not because I want to be a size 0 because I, ME, personally want to look better in my clothes and have a wider range of clothes to choose from....have you seen the plus size sections that they out in the back corner of stores these days?!

    I'm also doing it for the #1 reason, my overall health.

  2. I've done a similar post on my blog about this same issue. I think that when plus size celebrities lose weight their career sky rockets (with the exception of Oprah and Queen Latifah). As soon as a plus size celebrity with talent loses weight, she gets more movie roles, endorsements and so on. Examples of this are America Ferrera, Jennifer Hudson, and even Mo'Nique. Although these women got their claim to fame at their largest size it wasn't until they lost weight that you started seeing their career really blossom. It's really such an annoying thing. Crystal Renn already was famous for her curves but the big campaigns like Chanel came when she lost weight. As I always say. weight is a personal thing and you have to be able to accept yourself in order to live your best life. I don't think skinny women have more fun. I think a woman who is confident in her size and in who she is as a complete package no matter her size has the best fun.

  3. Wow at her last tweet. I guess Ms. Socialite would probably feel like she was missing out on something because she is imagining it that way.

    I have never been in the single digits ever, and I don't think I am missing a thing. If you are comfortable with yourself who is someone else, looking from the outside in, to say you are miserable because you can't do what they think you should be doing. That entire logic doesn't even make since to me.

    If she wants to lose weight she will, if not then why should someone else care? I could see if she was morbidly obese, then yes it would a great concern for her to be healthy.

    I am so tired of everyone putting all this emphasis on weight. I grew up with this same foolishness as a teenager...thinking I was fat because I was a lil thicker then the thin girls. Sorry I rambled on but I am passionate about this subject.

  4. Oh my. Here's my two cents as a 30 plus woman who has been EVERY size under the sun - from a 0 to a 22 and back down to a 10. I feel better about myself when I'm thinner. More confident and less self-conscious. But if you take clothing out the equation, my quality of life has not changed. I had a house, a great job, fun friends and hobbies, and a man who loved me at size 22. I still have all those things at a size 10. I have all this and I'm trying to lose more weight to feel good about me and to be able to wear even more cute clothes. I don't really care what other people think of my life and my motives.

    While Amber Riley may have potentially more commercial success if she loses weight, I don't believe that automatically means a better life. She's beautiful, talented and stylish. Why would anyone think her life is miserable?

    The exact same thing can be said for you - you have beauty, style and talent. The important questions are, do you recogonize you have all those qualities? And do YOU feel you're missing out on anything? I just don't think a nameless socialite gets to tell you if you're living your life right.

  5. Very interesting conversation and a very interesting topic.

    To me (a curvy 16), it's not about skinny girls having more fun. I think its more of an issue when it comes to skinny girls having more options available. I can agree with the Socialite to a certain extent when it comes to a skinny girl having more access to things than curvy girls, especially when it comes to fashion. CurlyKye brought up the same questions I always ask myself - why is it that I have to go out of my way to find my size? Why do I have to go online to shop at the same trendy stores that smaller sizes can just walk into? Why does a plus size celeb have to get a designer dress made for her when others can wear a sample size?

    It's extremely frustrating and presents up with a set of problems that smaller size girls may not encounter. However, obstacles should not define one's quality of life. Our fashion choices may be limited for now, we just have to get more creative. If a plus size actress can't get the same opportunities as a skinnier one, as Socialite pointed out - she can create her own opportunities. When there are enough of us curvy women making headways and not allowing the fashion world to dictate to us what looks good, they will take notice and things will change.

    Do I get frustrated and annoyed when I'm shopping? Absolutely! But no way does that say to me I'm living a miserable life. My life is miserable only if I make it that way!

  6. HA! I saw this twitter convo going on!

    As long as Amber Riley is healthy, than I don't care. However, her roles are going to be typecasted. I watch Glee and the one time she had a major role, she was the big girl who dealt with her emotions through food. How original. As a celeb, I guess it sucks that you can't really call in that Rodarte gown you saw on the runway b/c it's not available in your size.

    I don't think she should feel less beautiful. Or should big girls lead miserable lives. Confidence trumps all.

    Eileen - misswhoeveryouare.com

  7. We must think alike i did a post too about diets and how it does not work, its amazing that some people still have this idea that if you are big you are unhealthy! NOT TRUE!
    About this debate and that so called socialite, she needs to realize that its a persons personality that determines if they want to wear a one piece or not and that people can have fun at any size!

  8. As long as your dressing for your body type...we can all have fun. Everyone's personal prejudices are going to spill out around this topic...and those views will really just be a collection of their experiences around this. health should be the focus of any weight loss campaign (with very few exceptions). body type is largely something you can't change past a certain point. even ppl at their fittest don't all share the same body. their is a variable in there we can't control (our genes) and that means large thighs and round hips for someone like me no matter how hard i hit the tredmill and perhaps bone thin legs for some one else. as long as fashion ppl stay smart and keep creating clothing for the range of body types that exist in nature, it going to be an effing party for everyone. esp. those niche designers that understand that most of us don't have the "little boy" body type and work with fabrics, cuts, and styles that highlight curves its a friggin celebration!! i can argue that really pale people can't have as much fun in fashion as someone with my milk chocolatey complexion bc they look gross in bright colors...and colors in general... LOL but that would just be mean and for the most part subjective (i mean anne hathaway aways looks gorge and is cocaine white) . so at this point i'm off the topic. so my final tweet to this person would have been "SIT DOWN." -JUMS

  9. I think this is a very intriguing question. In the entertainment industry you tend to get farther if you are thin. It's not a great fact, or something to be proud of but it is true. I love Amber Riley. I'm happy to see a woman with curves succeeding, and looking great while she does it. Who cares if she can wear a two piece?

    Since April I have love 40lbs going from a size 14 to a size 8. While I'm not rail thin, I am thinner. I did it solely for health reasons. My doctor told me I needed to lose weight because of my past health conditions. I do feel more confident. But, what girls need to understand is we do not have these personal trainers, and someone to airbrush our photos. No matter what size you are, you still are yourself. You will have the same life, same husband, same job, etc. Your weight should never be a defining factor. Your eye color doesn't define you, so why let your weight? I did a post on this subject on my blog as well. Here is the link http://myheartblogged.blogspot.com/2010/11/losing-40lbs-and-what-ive-learned.html

  10. (I'm Skinny/Thin)Being curvey is nothing to be ashamed of, I do believe that it depends on what industry/career you are in that plays an important part on how you are perceived. However to address what the socialite said I believe their might be some truths but not totally,some people tend to speak from opinion and believe that it's fact. As long as you are not unhealthy or sloppy with it plus size is great! Love the skin you are in!

  11. I've heard that opinion before about Raven Simone. The whole she's too big for her age, and she should be able to enjoy herself and wear bikinis if she so chooses. It is a point to make, but it's ultimately up to that person to decide whether she feels as if she's missing out on something in her life. Health should be our first priority. Losing weight is always viewed in a positive light unless its of the anorexic variety.

  12. I think that 'socialite' sounds quite ignorant in my opinion. Skinny, fat, tall, short, black, white...it doesn't matter!!! Of course plus sized ladies have fun too, sometimes even more than 'skinny' ladies. And, no one should ever be judged or lead to believe that they're pitiful because of their weight. Comments and negative thinking from people like this 'socialite' is what is leading to the rise in depression and low self-esteem among young women. Although I don't watch Glee religiously, I have seen a couple episodes and I happen to like Amber. And, like you said, she does not dress sloppy or raunchy. Now, on the flip side, if someone's health is at risk because of their weight, then of course from a medical perspective that person should consider taking steps to lose weight. If you are perfectly fine health-wise, then do you
    and forget everyone else!

    *that's my two cents*

  13. When options are limited that sometimes means it's up to us to increase them. The world keeps on changing and we have to help it. Otherwise, African Americans would still be sitting in the back of the bus. Clothing options will continue to increase if plus size women demand it. After all, I can now buy Kenneth Cole, Michael Kors, Calvin Klein, Tahari and many more in my size 20 and that was not the case five years ago. And I've seen big girls in 2 pieces and nothing was hanging out that wasn't supposed to!

  14. This is such a weird topic for me because I dont consider myself plus sized but I know I am not thin either. I wear a 12/14/16 depending on the store I'm shopping at or the cut of the piece I'm trying on. Clothes in Lane Bryant are too big on me sometimes and jackets in ZARA always fit snug. I am curvy. 5'10, 38-33-.... but a whole lot of backside. At times am I aggravated that I can't just pick up something and not worry about how it will fit.. YES. Do I wish that once in life I'd experience wearing a bikini.. YES. BUT do I feel I am missing out.. NOT AT ALL. I am healthy, my clothing always looks great, and most of all I love what I see. Girls like Amber, Raven, and Jennifer are gorgeous no matter what size just like the rest of us.

    Bows and Lavender Lips

  15. of course it's better in this society to be small. I can't buy boots because my calves are too thick. Guess who went to school in Miami have never even worn a bikini? Sales/clearance clothing items are often left in sizes 2-6 and I wish that I could just snatch all of them up! All of my friends are size 0-6 while I'm the 12-16, it sucks.

    Now amplify that to hollywood! God, i couldn't even imagine...you're always the fat girl, never the love interest, can't order clothes straight from the runway for shows, overlooked or type cast for parts. i'd pass on that lifestyle and get skinny! Make some fat stand or get good work?

    http://sojournerspassport.com/straight-talk-about-feminine-aesthetics-dress-size-%e2%89%a0-curves-fat-rolls-%e2%89%a0-curves/ was very good to read on the subject

  16. I never thought me being a curvy girl I was or was going to be less satisfied in life...as long as my blood pressure was 120/80, I will order anything online(sometimes they do have a better selection), andsearch harder for the things I want to wear so I my clothes can fit well for my body.. and I am a size 10 w/ 36 ddd boobias!! lol..

    Confidence is key...with my health being intact life is good!!

  17. Can i be honest and say this. I'm plus sized...I use to think of myself as healthy until I was diagnosed with high blood pressure at 18. Thinking it was stress, and anxenity at 25, I now have diabetes, and my kidneys are failing. All because I decided to eat junk, because i said, oh this soda won't hurt. I always loved my curves, but then i soon started to feel sick and tired of only being able to find things in the mall that everybody else had.

    I now only do to the mall to buy handbags, shoes, and things like that. If i see something that fits i have to buy it online. I love it for one i know my body type, and some websites use real bigger models and then some use models that are like a size 10 with no curves, nothing and thats when i have an issues because ill go to the store and they don't have any left.

    Truth is at some point we have to realize that blood pressure isn't the only thing you have to worry about when you are overweight, you may love your curves, but just be sure that the things you are putting in your system won't kill you later on. Blood Pressure is not the only thing you have to worry about.

  18. I have been big for most of my life. In high school I came down to a size 8. I am now a size 18/20. I can say honestly I had more fun at the size 8. I can admit that I am jealous of my girlfriends that can order whatever they want out of a Victoria Secret magazine. I can also admit I was more adventurous in my clothes at the smaller size because I have more of a curvaceous shape. Jennifer Hudson is not crazy small now but she has opened more doors for her self now in a cookie cutter Hollywood.

  19. My bestie and I had a similar conversation yesterday after seeing more photos of the new JHud in Essence. I like the look. Miss her curves, think her voice has changed but at the end of the day if she is healthy, happy and confident then I can't and don't expect her or anyone else to change. Although we did agree that Gabby Sidibe didn't break out :( and yes her size had everything to do with Hollywood's acceptance.

    It is because they are celebrities De claim rights to comment on their lives. don't we have freinds and/or a family member that lost weight for a promotion, wedding or some BIG life changing event? Isn't it the same?

    I'm a skinty girl with hips (thank GOD) and no boobs. I love my curvy sisters. I can learn something about style from those who have it, lol. Who doesn't' want to fill out their halter maxi dress?

    Body image is a never ending topic. I've learned to accept the extra work I have to put in to make my top half look good while my bottom half is amazing (more laughs). Confidence is key. Wear what you like, be the size you life and top it off with the confidence...that gives any woman the right to never envy any part of someone else's life that a fellow tweeter or blog things you should have.

  20. WOW! At 23, I am a size 20. I have always been a big girl but I have never felt limited to ANY thing but the clothing I would love to wear. Yes, I want to lose weight to expand my wardrobe and to look better in my clothes BUT I have never wanted to do it because I felt that I would "enjoy life more" if I were slimmer. SO WHAT if she has to have her gowns made, that means she doesn't have to worry about the girl from Hairspray or Mo'Nique showing up in the same damn gown. It takes someone who can actually wear a two piece to ASSume that a plus size chick is unhappy rocking her one piece. AND we all know what happens when you assume....


  21. I do think skinny girls have more fun. I have been fat all my life. I'm 5.2 and the biggest I've been was a 14. I lost weight and was a size4/6 and now I'm back to being a 14. Now that I am back to being a 14, I can totally see the change in my attitude. I love clothes and it is frustrating that I have to try on everything to make sure it looks great on me. When I was smaller, I did not have to do that. I grabbed and go and I knew it will look great and it did. I can too see the change in how people view me. I definitely do not get the same amount of attention that I once did and it is frustrating when all of your friends are skinny and you are the exception. You are the one that gets the least amount of attention. I do believe that every big girl has a problem with her weight no matter what she is willing to say. I notice that a lot of big girl tend to be the funny one in the group and why is that? It is because we feel oppressed and to get the attention or validation from others, we have to make them laugh to make them feel like we’re worth it. I promise. Take a look at many different circles and I promise you, the big girl is always the funny one. I could be totally wrong on this, but I have to agree, skinny girls have more fun!

  22. I think this is a really interesting question. Right now Amber is able to be successful with her body the way it is, and that's great. A lot of non-Hollywood professional vocalists - especially opera singers - can be bigger and that doesn't affect their job prospects. But to really take off in Hollywood she would probably have to lose weight to get more roles. Glee is special in that it is a really inclusive show: one of the main characters is in a wheelchair, a series regular has Down's Syndrome, another is a very masculine-looking woman. But the rest of the women are skinny.

    Someone above mentioned Oprah and Queen Latifah as plus-size success stories. But Oprah had a very public battle with her weight in the 80s and 90s. And the Queen Latifah we see now is much slimmer than the Queen Latifah we first saw 20 years ago. She didn't get to Hollywood until fairly recently.

    I watch a lot of reality tv on Bravo (Millionaire Matchmaker, Real Housewives), and even they - supposedly real people - have slimmed down; I'm sure at the urging of some producers. For better or for worse in Hollywood you are judged by your looks. So from a completely professional standpoint Amber Riley would probably have an easier go of it if she slimmed down.

    But (and this is the last thing I'll say) we're in an interesting moment where we also have Christina Hendricks' super curvaceous body on Mad Men; I don't know if she's plus-size but she's certainly not Hollywood Skinny. I appreciate the women who are comfortable with their bodies and unapologetic about their size, and I hope that the success of these two shows and these actresses shows Hollywood that big can be beautiful (and successful!) too.


  23. OMG I LOVE THIS!!!

    I was reading an article yesterday that someone tweeted me. http://thefbomb.org/2010/08/the-woman-feminism-and-fashion/

    The best quote from it: "Designers should dictate fashion and not body shapes."

    Not everything is going to look good on everyone. I consider myself thin (not skinny!) and I wear bikinis but I also have a large chest so I can't wear certain bikini tops without looking obscene. Does that mean I should have a breast reduction to wear a triangle top? NO!

    Listen, my point here is that there's always going to be something you can't wear even if you are skinny.


  24. Being brutally honest, I think celebrity is a completely different beast than reality. Amber is absolutely gorgeous and has a voice to dies for, no matter her weight (same with J. Hud), but our society dictates that skinny is synonymous with beauty, health and success.

    Do I think that's true or fair? Absolutely not. Am I convinced this mentality will change over night? Unfortunately, no.

    I think society has to get to a place where we look past weight and skin color and hair texture and any other differentiators, before we can truly appreciate life. Trying to be skinnier or remain skinny is not living, and if Amber is having a ball collecting major bucks for singing/acting on Glee, and if she truly is happy with her body, then she's having more fun than most people.

    So what if she needed a custom gown for The Globes. What I would give for a designer to make a gown specifically for me, and I fit into a sample size!

    My point is, though I understand where your mystery socialite is coming from, I think she's the one missing out on life because she's obsessing over weight. I just want to eat and dance and wear clothes and drink whatever, because tomorrow I might not get the chance to do it. So, whether I'm skinny or not, I'm going to have fun.

  25. First of all, said Socialite is kind of a douche bag and whether she/he was being facitious, it's a dangerously opinion to put out there. I think the entire plus-size/skinny debate needs to be rooted in one thing: SELF LOVE. At the end of the day self-acceptance and health are key and if you have those two then it shouldn't matter whether you area size 2 or 22.

    Skinny women get the blues too and have body issues, just as much (if not more) than plus-size women. I think that a woman who embraces who she is, curves is all, is the most beautiful thing there is.

    Thanks Christina, I loved this piece!

  26. The ONLY reason for a big girl not to be happy is because of attitudes like these from the unnamed socialite. I'm a size 2 and I have rolls when I bend over in my bikini! We're women for god's sake. If we don't have fat, we're not even able to reproduce. It's not natural. Anyway, this sounds like the ranting of a celeb who feels she has to spend time and energy staying skinny and is jealous of someone who refuses to buy into that woman-hating crap. Because that's what it is: when we tell women that they can't be "happy" or they are not acceptable until they weigh a certain amount (think about the ridiculousness of that notion!) that is encouraging hatred. She looks pretty friggin happy to me! We need more women on TV demonstrating the diversity in the real world, as it pertains to size, race, height, ability, everything! If she becomes another size 2 cookie cutter then how is that interesting? Listen, losing weight is ok if it's done for the right reasons. And BTW the "for health reasons" line is all BS anyway. Most people want their "loved one" to lose weight because it's more socially acceptable to be thin and that is decidely UNloving. End rant.

  27. I'm not a blogger just someone who reads them and loves fashion. I think the idea that someone can only be happy at one size is ridiculous. Also, the notion that there is only "plus size" and "skinny" has to be destroyed. We are a million shapes and sizes! I am a single-digit size, but I would have rolls in a bikini (IF I even wore one, which I never will). What would Miss Socialite have to say about that?? People are happy and have fun for a million different reasons, it should not just be dictated by the dress size they can fit into. If I allow my wearing of a certain size, or even a certain style, to dictate whether I am happy, I have a pretty empty life. I see Gabby Sidibe in every interview as this articulate, confident, wonderfully peppy person that I WISH I could be like! If your doctor tells you that you need to lose weight to avoid health problems, then I think you should do so. But not because you want to be in a bikini. Hollywood is a different place, they only have overweight or underweight. No one (at least no WOMEN) are just average. Even Christina Hendricks, I am sure, would be shockingly small in person. Most people cannot have a tiny waist and large breasts and hips. It just doesn't happen very often without help of a corset. You can be happy at any size if you are a happy person! I am sure Amber Riley is soaking up this experience just as much as her thinner (and probably hungry all the time) costars! I am angry that this person wrote those things, it's completely ignorant. Skinny girls get more modeling and acting jobs, they DON'T have more fun in life!

  28. No, you're not missing out! It's really all about confidence and, as the previous commenter says, self-love.

    Example from my own experience: I was part of a chorale once at a not-so-happy time in my life, and we were doing a dance performance in addition to the singing. Our choreographer was a plus-sized girl bubbling with confidence and clearly totally at ease with her body, and I was so self-conscious at that time that I really couldn't make the dance moves look good despite being a usually good dancer with what the media would consider a near-ideal body (hourglass-curvyskinny-blabla). And sure enough, when we went on a tour to LA the choreographer girl wore a two-piece to the beach without thinking twice about it, while I still felt very "exposed" in mine...


  29. Maybe my ability to sew is altering my views a bit (because If I want something really badly but can't get it in my size I could just make it myself or get a custom order on Etsy), but I don't think I'm missing out on some mystical happy world that only thin people occupy. In all honesty, I consider the companies to be missing out since they are missing a huge opportunity to get my money by limiting their products to such a small amount of sizes. Its not as if fat people recently spawned out of thin air and are now demanding massive amounts of clothing that they cannot make. Fat people have been around for forever, so why can't these companies manufacture clothing tailor to fit us when plenty of us have the money to afford said clothing and would be happy to wear this clothing?

    Also, unnamed socialite sounds like an ass. I'm pretty sure the gorgeous Amber Riley seriously does not need any of her concern trolling. Ain't nothing wrong with getting a dress tailored to fit your body (and last I heard, isn't that what you want to do? To get clothing to fit YOU and not the other way around?).

  30. Honestly, in Hollywood, and unfortunately so, it is true. As long as the standard of beauty in America stays at the belief that thinner is better, this is going to remain true. We all can see that Amber Riley is a beyond beautiful girl with an amazing talent and personality, but as long as she stays in Hollywood, her greatest potential is to be "cute" or "she's a nice girl". However, in real life, after the cameras stop rolling it's fair game

  31. This comment has been removed by the author.

  32. Truth be told,in my opinion size has nothing to do with happiness, happiness is a state of mind I know a lot of flawless perfect size ladies who are miserable and to boot dateless. If you are confident in who you are a size 6 or 26 that is going to come across, how others feel about that is merely a personal issue many people believe you can not truly be happy unless you're thin and heaven forbid you even attempt to look happy if you're not. Amber Riley is adorable and bottom line she landed the roll (period) so I'd say she's happy and laughing all the way to the bank right along with Oprah. Happiness comes from within not from the label in the back of your dress

  33. I think the other commenters have really said everything I could say about Hollywood/shopping, but I wanted to reply to your last paragraph-

    I am thin, and I certainly don't think my curvier friends are miserable or have less fun than I do. When I see plus-size girls when I'm out, I don't think they must be miserable either. If a woman looks like she is having a good time, looks confident, looks happy, I assume she is happy, and I move on (I try not to obsess over other people :) )

    Of course, I'm someone who has struggled with body image in the past (even as a thin person), and I have finally come to the conclusion that being happy and confident (and healthy) is what's important, not the number on the scale or the tag.

  34. Throughout the years I've been model thin to a now English size 14 (US 10?). My main body concern is being toned not losing weight. It's taken a long time I've been brainwashed from a young age as a catwalk model but I'm very aware of my issues. My weight has come with womanhood and not being such a food fascist as I was back in the day. I love my shape but I would not want to be any bigger than I am, because i wouldn't feel good about myself and that's the truth. But I don't let anyone dictate what I should look like (anymore). I/ we should set our own standards for ourselves.
    That twitter woman is an idiot and a wind-up.
    There is no such thing as perfection! Clothes look good and bad on the individual and there is a lot that looks better on curvier girls than slimmer girls and vice versa. Just work with what you've got.
    Fabulous post!
    CamilleA (Karma-Style)

  35. I really hope this doesn't come off as really rude. I promise it is not my intention to insult anyone.

    I think there's a huge difference (pun unintended) between "curvy" and unhealthily overweight. I hate to say that while curvy encompasses a lot of sizes, there comes a point where it's very clear that someone is unhealthy at their current weight, and at that point, yeah, it becomes not only aesthetically unappealing, but also sort of...sad? Don't think I'm getting on just curvy/big girls, here, though, because the same holds true at the other end of the spectrum. It makes me hurt to see someone obese the same way it hurts me to see someone extremely thin. I know they're not happy or healthy. The fact of the matter is, though, it's easier for a thin girl to hide that she is unhealthily skinny with clothing, and much harder for a bigger woman especially when there's very few fashionable stores that carry their sizes and so few of them know how to dress their bodies to show off their curves and not accentuate their...er...rolls?

    Having been on the very extremely skinny side, once as low as 79 pounds at my current height of 5'6", I know for a fact that being that skinny, it's not fun. I can only imagine that at the other extreme, it's equally unfun and has the same amount of stigma, at least socially.

    I may have derailed here. point is, I don't think curvy or skinny girls have more fun. HEALTHY girls have more fun. The ones who don't worry about their weight, and have no health problems because of it, who are in shape, no matter what size they are.

  36. I have been too thin all my life, and I can guarantee you that skinny girls do NOT have more fun. Of course, I'm not a celebrity or a socialite. Being skinny has not done anything really to enhance my life. My niece is overweight and has a very active social life, lots of friends and boyfriends, and generally gets more out of life than I ever did. She is very (very) beautiful, talented, and loved by her family, and she knows it. Confidence gets you a lot farther in life than a number on a scale.

    I'd like my niece to lose weight for her health, and I'd like to gain weight for my health. Even if we were both at ideal healthy weights, she'd be having more fun because she knows how to do that, and I am still learning.

  37. I think it depends so much on the personality. As a girl that was never skinny but always wanted it (especially when I was an innocent 6-year-old wondering why me, how sad is that) I have to say that yes, it does seem skinny girls have more fun. but not always. some plus-size stars out there seem perfectly comfortable and content with their image, and that can't mean they're not having fun, at least as much as the stick-thin girls.

    though frankly, I have to say, I've been skinnier and it was no party. rather than feel unbelievable and see all my fantasies come true, I didn't see much at all. yes, my jeans hung off my hips even after taking them in, but I was still a little girl that didn't understand why the world couldn't love me even if I'd been chubby. which is probably why the miracle didn't last. and looking back, I was just a perfectly healthy albeit chubby child that grew up into a damaged, overweight teenager and that's something I wish on no one.

    this may have been incoherent, but this is a topic very close to home.

  38. I don't think fun is the issue here. No, not just skinny girls can have fun. ANyone can have fun. But the think is, there are some oppportunities that are only open to skinny girls, like for example being in a men's magazine. I guess it just depends on the opportunity. If you want to get have an opportunity to work in a good company, then have better grades, study hard.

  39. Are you exercising? Are you eating healthy food? Do you feel healthy?
    I haven't been small since I was a child. I'm tall and I wear a 12 or a 14 and have for years. Do I wish I was a smaller size? Sure. Clothes look better and I'd probably feel sexier. But there's only so much we can do and sustain that change. I think we're meant to be different sizes as much as we're meant to have different textured hair or be different hights. As long as you're healthy, I think you should enjoy your curves!

  40. Really tricky question... I'm a very happy plus size girl and I don't feel like my size holds me back.
    However, I do get really disappointed when I go shopping. There are only a few stores I can shop in and most of the clothes there are ugly. Th UK does not have as many plus size shops as the US(but it is getting better) and I find it hard to find clothes that fit my personality.
    If I was 1-2 dress sizes smaller I could buy clothes in any shop anf I do think that if I lost a little weight clothes could be so much more fun and a much wider variety would be on offer to me.
    This has given me a lot to think about x

  41. I am a little late on this discussion, I know, but I have been having some issues lately with my weight. I used to wear a size 6-- jeans, dresses, everything. Medium sized shirts, curvy but slender, etc, etc... not rail thin by any stretch of the imagination, but certainly at or just below average weight for my height.

    I went dress shopping today for a formal dress-- college formal, was looking for something classy and Audrey Hepburn-ish (a style I used to pull of regularly, and with a fair amount of success.) I discovered that I couldn't fit into anything under a size 10. I was so upset. I know it's not a huge thing, and I realize I am probably in a position that a lot of people would like to be in. But the sudden change was a little shocking to me.

    Point is, clothes shopping was a lot more fun when I was skinnier.

  42. I think this is a good debate. I had a similar conversation with a friend (also plus sized). Personally, im an 18 and have been for a couple of years. I will admit that its annoying and hard to be this size and find cute affordable clothes, especially because im pear shaped (i have a small chest, I wear a 38 B) but I still find ways to manage. Im still considered one of the most fashionable of my friends. although i could stand to loose some weight im still healthy overall. I have not experienced a drought in the mens attraction either. I am constantly hit on. I feel like the fashion industry needs to change. Not the people.

  43. I NEVER found a bikini that wouldn't fall on me, because i'm thin from everywhere (yeah), so i decided some months ago that i would find a nice swimsuit that hangs.
    I'm sick of having to check every few minutes if someone can see something inappropriate :S

    About her argument on bikini : i'm not sure showing as much skin as possible on the beach is a real goal in life.

  44. I am 5'3 and 140lb so the salesperson at department store, recommended the medium size. My first time out wearing this under a sheer skirt, I spent the entire time tugging this thing down over my butt. Every 3 feet it rode back up to the point where I had to duck between 2 cars to get it down to a decent level. It was the most uncomfortable walk I've ever taken (to work!) and I will be purchasing a different slip as soon as I can. It was pretty humiliating have dirty old men glancing back every 15 seconds to see how much my slip wasn't hiding. I plan to order Barely There 4J87